Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
