you win again, gameday.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
