they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
