once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
