He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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