alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
