On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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