I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
