It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
