How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
