Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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