biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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