Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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