You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
