So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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