how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
