i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
