I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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