its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Randomize
