"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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