ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
