True but thats because hes a fetus.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
