dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
