i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize