Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
