sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
