Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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