Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Life is so much better after having sex.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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