it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
