with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
