Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
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