You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
