Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
