nut hugger
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
