I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
My life is pants optional.
PANTIES FOUND
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
