i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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