at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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