I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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