She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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