i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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