Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Houston, we have a squirter
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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