my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
