I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
