duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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