I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
