It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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