he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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