Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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