good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize