hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
